Self-Reflection: A Year to be Remembered
So you're basically coming back home, then.
These are words that I will never forget. My Ukrainian classmate and I were discussing what brought me to Poland, a place that foreigners largely move to for a job, or for love, or for refuge, the latter being the case for many, including my classmate. I was undoubtedly an oddity when I explained that I simply wanted to learn Polish. "But why?" coupled with a puzzled look was often the response that I'd receive, upon which I would shrug and smile it off. I try to avoid diving into the nuances that led me back to my grandmother's homelands, as they are quite personal to me.
For my close friends, you know there isn't much need to remind you how awful 2023 was for me. I dealt with discrimination in the form of sexism in my previous job, an unfortunate yet common experience for women in the tech industry. This was followed by a dear friend, life mentor, and former boss of mine - who largely inspired me to do what I do today - taking her own life in a way that altered my perspective of what it means to be truly living. And quite a few other things that I won't dive into, but in general, 2023 sucked. Big time.
When 2024 came around, I gathered every will in my human body to make sure that this year would bring me and my wife changes that we needed. That we would get back to doing the things that we loved to do, one of which was traveling. A lot of ours trips in previous years were focused within Oaxaca, of which I got to know pretty well for someone considered as a foreigner. However, I was itching to see faraway places, to go somewhere that satisfied the thirst of being in an unfamiliar place.
And boy, did we get caught up on our travels. I won't bore you with the details, but in 2024 we spent time in seven different countries, five states in the United States, five states in Mexico, and three continents. Two of the countries - Türkiye and Austria - were completely new to me. And most importantly, we completed a transatlantic move from Mexico to Poland with three dogs in tow, a feat that we're proud of but also willing to never do again.
Shown below are some of my favorite moments from the year, ranging from street tacos in Mexico City to beautiful sceneries in southwest Colorado to crossing off a few Bucket List items in Istanbul.
First photo shows a plate piled with tacos al pastor from a taqueria in Mixcoac, Mexico City. Second photo shows two passports being held (United States and Poland). Third photo shows a plate of overstuffed Michoacán-style tacos de carnitas at a taqueria in downtown Mexico City.
We did a quick trip to Mexico City to grab my second passport, which caused our dream of living in Europe to be within reach. Naturally, we couldn't visit Mexico City without grabbing some mouth-watering street tacos, particularly from my favorite taqueria that's located in the Mixcoac colonia.
I watched numerous sunsets over the San Juan mountains in San Miguel county, Colorado. My parents spend their summers here to escape the unbearable Georgia heat, and I've been fortunate to be able to spend quality time with them here these last few years.
First photo shows a plastic bottle of freshly made madrecuishe mezcal from May 2024. Second photo shows the fermentation process for mezcal, which involves letting the agave fibers ferment in wooden vats. The third photo shows the scenery that surrounds the palenque.
We visited a friend's palenque just outside of Miahuatlán de Porfirio Díaz, Oaxaca, where we stocked up on some of her delicious mezcal. She utilizes the artesanal process which helps bring out the rich herbal flavors that one may typically find within the mezcals from the Sierra Sur region. Her mezcals will soon be available in Poland; more to come about this tidbit in the near future.
We ate Turkish breakfast containing influences from the Anatolian region in Türkiye. It's an honest truth when I say that I strictly booked the trip to Istanbul to achieve my Bucket List item of eating a proper Turkish breakfast. And I would do it again in a heartbeat.
First photo shows a unique looking building with walls made with stones that appear to be carefully placed one above another. Second photo shows St. Mary's Basilica in Old Town. Third photo shows what a typical side street looks like in Kraków.
And last, but not least, are the moments spent reconnecting with my ancestral roots in Poland. For most of my life I felt like I didn't belong anywhere. I grew up in the South as a daughter of an immigrant, and while my dad is from around those parts, my childhood years were influenced by my Canadian mother. I never learned the Pledge of Allegiance word for word and mostly mumbled it to the best of my ability, if it all. Ditto for the Star-Spangled Banner. I tried many ways to better fit into my environment, including moving to five different states, yet I kept feeling like a fraud and an outsider no matter where I went. That is, until we moved to Kraków.
So when I attempted to partially explain what it was that brought me back to Poland to my Ukrainian classmate, it was oddly - and sadly - a feeling relatable for her. My grandmother was also a refugee - a crisis spawned from the horrors of World War II - who was violently taken away from her home in Poland during her childhood years. It wasn't until 2022 when I uncovered documentation tracing my exact lineage back to her hometown, which served as a calling for me to learn more about where my family called home for centuries.
"So you're basically coming back home, then", said my classmate, filling in the gap of my unspoken feelings and intentions for my desire to live in Poland. To be seen and heard as such caused a heavy yet calming sensation to wash over me, that perhaps this wasn't something that was done out of naiveté. That perhaps maybe I can make something meaningful out of this new experience in life. That perhaps I can obtain a sense of belonging somewhere after all.